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Lack of compatibility, sexual undesire and anger issues harming my marriage.

Asked by Female, 34, Married

I am married and have daughter aged 3 years. I have anger issues, which effecting my relationship with my husband and my whole family. I get angry at every small, trivial thing and start shouting. Fight with everyone in the family, blame others. We also have a major problem in sexual relationship. Lack of compatibility. After 5 years of marriage I still hate having sex.

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Answer

Komal

Counseling Psychologist

Answered almost 4 years ago

Anger is a natural emotional reaction, a way of us responding and expressing that we are hurt and in pain. You seem to be well aware of your anger issues and it would help for you to first explore why it exists in the first place. It would also help for you to get a medical check-up to look for hormonal changes/ hypertension/ high blood pressure/ thyroid/ PCOS/ post partum depression. The existence of any of these common causes could explain the emotional outbreaks.

Going in for anger management seems to be an option worth considering as well as individual counselling.
It seems to me that there is more than your anger that needs to be addressed here and to explore that and understand it in detail, the roots of the anger issues needs to be looked at to be able to resolve it.

With regards to the sexual issues and issues of lack of compatibility between yo both, going for couple's therapy might help. Incompatibility with your partner is not easy to live with, but if you both intend and will to work towards it, it is possible.

You might also want to visit a sexologist or a sex therapist to find out the reason behind you hating to have sex in your marriage of 5 years.

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