It's not uncommon for couples to develop problems after an extended period of time. Multiple factors usually lead to it, but most commonly, it could be a resultant of residual feelings. Given that there aren't too many details available on what's going wrong between the two of them, I would recommend that they visit a mental health professional/ marriage counselor to work through the hitches in their marriage.

It's quite a painful and sensitive realization to watch your husband recoil from attempts of intimacy. The fact that you're trying to reach out and figure this out is your first step already taken. You'e recently welcomed a big change in your life, a baby. Such a change usually brings along a shift in life. maybe your husband was not fully prepared to face the situation and seems to have cut -off emotionally and physically. The same could have happened with you, if he has suggested that you need to seek help, maybe it's worth looking into and figuring out why he thinks you need help. It...

I gather from your explanation that your needs and the needs of your in-laws have not been voiced adequately/ reasonably. It's appreciative that you're able to consider your husband's goodness as a strong enough actor to keep you from making a big decision. With your husband, if there are things about him that you would like changed, then maybe talking to him about it openly, in a non-offensive manner is your first step. Getting to know why he does/ doesn't do things a certain way will add more dimension to your understanding of him. It's possible that you may find some of things worthy...

A divorce is a big turning point in a marriage. If you think your wife has not made this decision on her own, maybe you could have one conversation with her about the basis on which her choices were made. You could suggest the involvement of a family member or two to help you both decide if this is the conclusion you both want to arrive at. Or you could seek help from a marriage counselor together to fully assess your situation and provide a non-judgmental take on your relationship. Allow your wife to feel like she still has the liberty to make a choice but that you would like to seek...

You seem to have a lot going on, with a baby and your in-laws and the nuances of a joint family life. From what I gather, you seem to have a supportive husband which can work in your favor as far as your job is concerned. Your idea of going in for a government job seems like a good option. It gives you enough time away from home, where nobody seems to understand your ambitions and also enough time to be able to spend it with your husband and child. Take up your husband's offer of getting a helping hand with the baby, after comprehensive background checking so that you can trust that you've...

It looks like you've been deprived of the affection and companionship that comes with a marriage. You got married at a tender age when all of this must have been so much more important and not having your husband's attention and love must have been very disheartening for you. It's worthy of appreciation that you've been able to persistently try to win him over and still put in effort after all this time and not give up, it takes a lot of strength to stay in such a marriage. In my opinion, initiate a serious and focused conversation with your husband about the lack of romance and...

Anger is a natural emotional reaction, a way of us responding and expressing that we are hurt and in pain. You seem to be well aware of your anger issues and it would help for you to first explore why it exists in the first place. It would also help for you to get a medical check-up to look for hormonal changes/ hypertension/ high blood pressure/ thyroid/ PCOS/ post partum depression. The existence of any of these common causes could explain the emotional outbreaks. Going in for anger management seems to be an option worth considering as well as individual counselling. It seems to me...

I see that you are unhappy with your marriage emotionally. You find your husband to be emotionally distant and you long for his expression of love, care, concern and attention towards you. It is only natural for you to want this, especially considering that you have been only recently married. Some common reasons why a man may behave so towards his wife is that he might have not gotten married to you out of love or is incapable of showing it you you in ways that you understand. Different individuals have different ways in which they understand and express love. Your way might be through...

I see that you are caught between your marriage, taking care of your kids and your job. I understand that you must be finding this unfair for your husband to make you choose between your career and your home. It is not an easy position to be in and it is certainly unpleasing. Well, a marriage is a union between two people willing to be in it together and build a future together. It seems as if though he wants you to bring up the children and not your parents and it gets difficult to do so while on a full time job. Regardless, you have a right to make your own life choices and it seems...

I can understand how difficult that must be for you to live with. It can get difficult to handle someone's ego and to always be on a watch to ensure that they don't feel offended. It's almost as if it stops you from being able to express your anger to him. And even if you do, he ends up holding it against you for months. For starters, it might help for you to explore what makes him feel so offended by you speaking with a raised voice. What about it leads him to holding it up against you for months. Try to understand what's beneath his ego. Help him see that you're on his side and are...

Difficulties arising in relationships is a natural phenomenon and resolving through them together is the growth of the relationship. However, if these difficulties become frequent/ intense and difficult to deal with over time for either or both partners is when it calls for attention. I sense from what you say that you feel lie it is too early for problems to be arising in your marriage, given that it has been only 8 months into your marriage. However, every couple is unique depending on the dynamics they share together. For starters, identify the difficulties in your relationship....

Difficulties arising in relationships is a natural phenomenon and resolving through them together is the growth of the relationship. However, if these difficulties become frequent/ intense and difficult to deal with over time for either or both partners is when it calls for attention. I sense from what you say that you feel lie it is too early for problems to be arising in your marriage, given that it has been only 8 months into your marriage. However, every couple is unique depending on the dynamics they share together. For starters, identify the difficulties in your relationship....

Difficulties arising in relationships is a natural phenomenon and resolving through them together is the growth of the relationship. However, if these difficulties become frequent/ intense and difficult to deal with over time for either or both partners is when it calls for attention. I sense from what you say that you feel lie it is too early for problems to be arising in your marriage, given that it has been only 8 months into your marriage. However, every couple is unique depending on the dynamics they share together. For starters, identify the difficulties in your relationship....

When it comes to saving a marriage, usually one of the partners is more interested in keeping it alive. He or she then motivates the other partner to join the efforts in protecting their relationship. Sometimes it happens that both partners share the equal determination to save their marriage when problems arise. You may want to reach out to marriage counselor and learn how to improve your communication and find a constructive way to solve conflicts in your marriage. You need to learn how to fight for your marriage in a constructive and an effective way. Take time to think: is my...

I am really sorry to hear about your loss. I can only imagine how painful it must have been for you to have taken this decision and to have your husband not only not support you but also blame you for the loss and its effects on the relationship. You long for his understanding, love and support but it looks like he is really hurt and angry for the loss. He seems to be feeling helpless which is resulting in him blowing off the steam on you and taking it out on the relationship. This is unfair to you both. The deterioration in the marriage is not going to help him cope with the loss, the...

One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. For a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be equally invested to work towards it. With the basic emotional and physical needs not in place for a strong foundation, anything that is built upon it will turn out to be shaky. This is certainly not why someone enters into a marriage. I can imagine your pain and agony. It was mature of you to have shared your concerns about the marriage with your husband but instead of validating or being sensitive...

One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. For a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be equally invested to work towards it. I see that because of many issues in your marriage you are unhappy in it. What would help is to figure out whether these issues are workable or not. If you and your partner agree to work on it together, it would help for both of you to go for couple's counselling. It will help provide you both a safe space to be heard and work together on your issues...

One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. For a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be equally invested to work towards it. I see that because of many issues in your marriage you are unhappy in it. What would help is to figure out whether these issues are workable or not. If you and your partner agree to work on it together, it would help for both of you to go for couple's counselling. It will help provide you both a safe space to be heard and work together on your issues...

Living with a spouse who does not care for your thoughts and opinions is extremely difficult and not preferable. I can imagine how tied you must be feeling when you are not allowed to even speak up. It's almost like you are not allowed to have an identity of your own within the marriage. To top it, he expects you to take responsibility of the kids while he can choose to not contribute. This seems really unfair on you. When things are calm, talk about the relationship. You can start the conversation by saying “You’re important to me and I want you in my life. There are some things in this...

One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. With the basic respect and responsibility not met and enduring a feeling of being blamed and criticised by your partner is certainly not why someone enters into a marriage. Moreover, even your child is bearing the brunt of this. I can imagine your pain and agony. Before moving on any further, ask yourself if you are willing at all to give a chance to this marriage or not. Also try to figure out if your husband is willing to do the same. For a happy and...

For any relationship to work, both partners have to be equally willingly invested to make it work. In collectivist societies, families still continue to have a huge say in almost every major and minor aspect of our life and somehow many of us come to believe that we owe our lives to them for what they have done for us. Unfortunately when families disagree for their child’s choice of marriage, be it due to it being a love marriage or financial status and security or caste or religion or family background, it becomes quite a difficult task for the lovers to convince them, leaving the...

Your frustration and helplessness seems to be evident in the presence of a marriage that's has gone bad. That along with your child turning against you is quite a painful situation. It looks like your wife is letting the external influences of other family members affect your marriage a little more than it should. As much as the extended family matters, a marriage and its contents are primarily between the two partners. In my opinion, talking to your wife, in the presence of your son, if you think is okay, can help define the actual problems. Many times one sour incident can be the...

Every couple is unique in itself and depending on their individual personalities, them as a unit, and the dynamics of the relationship, you can try out multiple things to see what suits you both best. Everyday rituals- invent some everyday rituals as a couple that you both enjoy doing for each other and for yourself and follow them religiously every single day. This will help keep the romance alive in the relationship for years to come. It can be as simple as never missing to kiss goodbye to each other when the other steps out from home for work. Have at least one meal of the day...

Thank you for writing in to us. Recognising when you need help and reaching out for the same is the first courageous step to be able to take towards a better self. One enters into marriage with dreams of hoping to start a new journey with their partner that is filled with love and happiness. For a happy and successful marriage, both partners need to be equally invested to work towards it. With time, sure a relationship is expected to grow but not at the cost of having left no room for excitement or enjoyment in it or for having left no regard or respect for either partner in it. I can...

A successful marriage entails that both partners understand how the other functions and are aware of their preferences. Having someone micromanage, especially your spouse who you live with under the same roof, can get really frustrating. We all like and prefer at least a bit of our own space and freedom in our relationships. When we advise or when our partner advises, it usually is with the intention of helping out. However, too much of it conveys to the other that they do not believe enough in you to be able to manage the work by yourself. This can create a rift and give way to...

Your situation is quite unfortunate, no one should have to face abuse at the hands of family. Thank you for taking a step and reaching out. There seems to be a lack of communication/ understanding of facts between the two parties ( you and your in-laws/husband). It seems like your husband was never interested in the marriage and was probably forced to do so or that your in-laws have probably gone too far with comparison leading to more distance between you and your husband. It is possible to know their problems with you or the reason for their behavior only by asking. Communication can...

Yes, you're quite right. If suicidal thoughts have become a part of your daily life, seeking professional help is a priority. You have gone through a traumatic experience with your partner and it seems to have affected you greatly. I would strongly suggest reaching out to a counselor/ mental health professional and making your well-being a priority at the moment. Your relationship with your wife and the turn your marriage has taken can be due to various reasons. Also it is unclear on whether you are separated from her or are legally divorced. If there is a possibility of addressing...

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help. It seems that you are facing difficulty in your marriage as you struggle to maintain a good relationship with your wife due to her anger and misunderstandings. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in and cope with. Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. Could you tell me a little bit about yourself and your wife individuals? What do you both do? Was it an arranged or a love marriage? For how long have you both been married? How...

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help. It seems that you are facing difficulty in your marriage with regard to finding a balance and matching with your partner on levels of emotional sensitivity and compatibility and it frustrates you when he ends up getting hurt by taking things personally. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in. Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. Could you tell me more about what you mean when you say that you are a free spirited person and that...

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help. It seems that you are facing difficulty in your marriage. You are having to face a lot of fights with your wife.s. Your wife has OCD that is causing most of the reasons for her issues with your parents. You wish she would be more understanding when reasonably necessary. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in managing both your parents and your wife. Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. I can only imagine how difficult a situation...

Hi Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help. It seems that you are facing difficulty in your marriage. After having your child, your wife moved to her parent's house and since then you feel that she is drifting away from you in this relationship. She does not seem interested in taking your calls and also does not allow you to see your daughter even on phone. I understand that it must be a difficult position for you to be in, away from your wife and your daughter. Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. I...

Hi Writer, Thank you for writing in. It takes great courage to reach out for help. It seems to me that you are facing difficulty with your marriage. Although it has been a couple of years, it was a marriage you were forced into and you are not happy in it. I understand that it must have been very difficult for you to get married out of your choice. Firstly, I would appreciate the courage in you for being able to manage so far. Five years is a long time to be able to continue in an unhappy relationship. Could you tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals? Who...

Hello Writer, Thank you for giving me further details about your marriage. During the four years of courtship there was no tension at all but during the wedding there was tension on dowry related matters. You feel deeply frustrated that your husband does not understand you well even when you are in physical pain and not able to stand to do the household chores. It is not that you have not done anything to help his mother but you are not meeting the expectations. His unhappy face, negative remarks and shouting at you deeply disturbed. I know you carry a lot of pain with you within 5...

Hi Cajeshwari, thank you for reaching out to us. From what you have expressed, it sounds like your relationship has always seen you working hard towards the relationship and not much from him. Am I right in saying so? Has some incident happened recently that has frustrated you the most to reach out now? Sounds like his irresponsibility towards you is what bothers you the most. Can you share an incident?

Hello Writer, Thanks for contacting the Askmile team Seeking help with regard to your marital issues. It appears you are very frustrated with what is happening in your marriage.You came to the marriage with a lot of expectations, particularly experiencing support and care from the husband. However, what you experience is that he gives a lot of attention to his mother and sisters while you feel neglected and marginalized. This is causing a lot of anxiety and pain in you. You found your having a lot of affection for his mother and sisters. What about his father? How many sisters? He...

Hi, thank you for reaching out to us. Sounds like you are left very confused and upset to find your husband reacting to you in the way that he is. How long has he been behaving this way? Have you tried to talk to him and find out if something is bothering him or if he is upset with you about anything?

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are going through a difficult time in your relationship. You say that there were mistakes you had made earlier which affected your partner. Now she is doing the same things to hurt you and you don't know if it is because she listened to some to counsellor or if she is doing this on her own to get back at you. To understand your situation better could you tell me more about yourself and your partner as individuals? Also what are things that she is doing to hurt you? Please message back to continue discussing. Regards.

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. It takes courage to reach out and ask for help. I understand you are going through a difficult time in your marriage. You feel your mother-in-law is responsible. However to understand your situation better could you tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals? How long have you been married? Could you describe the problems in detail and why your mother-in-law is to blame for that? Please message back to continue discussing. Regards

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes courage to reach out and ask for help. I understand you have needs that are not being met in your marriage. You have been approached by your ex for a relationship and you are tempted. Well to understand your situation better could you tell me more about yourself and your marriage? Your husband works a lot but how is your interaction with each other and have you spoken to your husband about your dissatisfaction? How long have you and your ex been in contact with each other? Also your decision might have repercussions either way, do you...

Hi Writer, thank you for reaching out to us. Could you tell me why you're having a difficult time trusting your husband?

Hello Writer, Thank you for reaching out to the Askmile team with your difficulties with your husband and predominant unhappiness that you experience due to lack of love and care from him. Certainly, it is a tough experience when you find that your husband is not caring enough for you and the baby. During pregnancy you felt your husband did not do enough for you in terms of emotional support and family management. After the delivery you had to to everything to manage the baby and the household stuff and it is quite disappointing that your husband did not do much. It appears there is a...

Hello Writer, Thanks for reaching out to the askmile team with your concerns on your marriage. You love your husband a lot but he is not reciprocating which is your primary issue. It is a tough thing to experience no love from your husband while he shows a lot of affection and care for others around him, especially his family. Your experiences in the marriage make you feel sidelined and belittled. I sense how much pain and agony this has caused in your life. I know you feel very disturbed with your husband's behavior and feeling internally agitated. The thought of suicide indicates how...

Hi Writer, thank you for reaching out to us. I'm sure it isn't easy to have an unsettling feeling and not know exactly what it is. How long have you been married for? And how long have you been feeling this way?

Hi Writer, thank you for reaching out to us. Sounds to me that you are feeling disconnected from your wife and other aspects of your life as well. You stated that the distance between you and your wife is more from her end but, you are having a difficult time connecting and engaging in other aspects of your life?

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. You have shown so much courage in reaching out to us. I understand you are going through a very difficult time. You feel neglected and undervalued. You have done right by all your duties for so long and now you have reached a point where you are exhausted emotionally and physically. Not receiving the kind of validation you deserve and expect can be upsetting and draining. I would like to know more about you and your situation. It will help me understand and guide you better. Could you please tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals...

Hello Writer, Thanks for contacting the askmile team with your objective of getting help for solving the problem in your marriage as you do not want to break your marriage. You are troubled with the issue but you do not intent to break the marriage which shows the level of your maturity and your good intentions for the family life. You appears to be confident of finding a solution. Please share with us in detail what is the basic issue that trouble you with regard to your marriage. Also tell us a a bit more about the background of your marriage. How long you are married? Is it a a...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are very concerned about your brother's marriage. The situation better is quite serious understandably. The important thing is whether the couple involved want to work this out or not because the fate of their relationship is completely in their hands. Are they open to seeking help? Please message back to continue discussing.

Dear Writer, I understand that you are very troubled about the escalating fights in your marriage. Could you tell me more about yourself and your wife as individuals. It will help get a better grip of your situation. Also what I gather is that there is an incompatibility issue here but we need to figure out where exactly it lies. Your aggravated level of fights tell me that there might also be a communication problem. Perhaps your need to be heard is louder than your need to listen to each other. We will get to this point once you provide me with more information about both of you. Please...

Hi Writer, thank you for reaching out to us. I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a rough time in your relationship. It must be hurtful to not get the attention that you want from your partner. I will need more information about your relationship before I can assist you further. What stops you from leaving him? How long have you been together for?

Hi Writer, thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like this situation has left you quite confused on what might have triggered this sudden behaviour change in her. Could you tell me more about what led to the separation 6 years ago to begin with?

I understand you are concerned about your marriage. Could you tell me what are the things you both tend to fight about? Also could you tell me more about yourself and your wife as individuals? It will help me understand your situation better and guide you accordingly While it's natural to have disagreements, what matters is how you both communicate, understand and solve the matter. The first year of marriage is often considered the hardest because you getting to know each other's likes and dislikes while living with each other. Both of you are bound to irritate each other as well.

Hi Writer, thank you for sharing your problem. I understand it must be difficult and confusing at this point since it sounds like you must have built a some form of a relationship with your wife in the last 4 years and you also acknowledge that she has some good qualities, which makes it hard to take a decision that might be hurtful to her.

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. You have shown a lot of courage by reaching out to us. I understand you are upset over the state of your marriage. You have expectations and it is natural to want intimacy and for your relationship to evolve. Have you tried talking to him about it and if you have what is his take on it? Although you fight a lot, how is your interaction otherwise? Could you also tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals? It will help me understand better and guide you accordingly. Please message back to continue discussing. I am here to help....

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you have trouble trusting your husband. Just to clarify, him not showing his phone to you worries you and makes you doubt him. Is there any other reason that could have contributed to this distrust? With respect to wanting access to him phone, why do you need to see his phone in the first place? He is entitled to his privacy and as a matter of fact so are you. It does not necessarily mean that a partner has something to hide. Does he not communicate with you or tell you anything? Are there any other problems between the two of you?...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are upset over your husband's behaviour. Change can be hard for some people and everybody has different ways of dealing with it. It is the first year of marriage and it is an important time to understand each other's​ needs while having your own expectations. It's important to know what one can and cannot compromise on. I suspect your husband may have shut down in the face of all these changes. Have you tried talking to him about his non- participation? Ask him if he is happy? Tell him you understand that it isn't easy for him...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. Whether trivial or not, if it's affecting your relationship then it's important. Why do you think keeping a score on how many days each person is spending with either family has become such a big issue? Is there more to it or is it about fairness? Could you also tell me more about your relationship with your wife and the relationship you both share with either set of parents? Answering this will help me understand your situation better and help you accordingly. Please message back to continue discussing. I am here to help. Regards

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes courage to reach out for help. I understand you are concerned about the state of your marriage. You and your husband are opposites in personality. That's not necessarily a problem. You are expressive which means you are more comfortable expressing your needs and problems compared to your husband. I understand that you need attention and want to feel valued by your husband. These are your expectations in order to feel loved by your husband. So that means your husband doesn't give you any attention or values you at all? (Please clarify) What...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. It takes courage to reach out and take this step. I understand your husband's lying is making your anxious and understandbly upset. You have independently been taking care of financial responsibilities and while that's a good thing, I understand you want your husband to contribute as well. Could you please answer the following questions to help me understand your situation better: 1. How long have you been married and when did the problem start ? 2. Does his behaviour make it difficult for you to trust him and rely on him and how is this...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. It takes courage to reach out and take this step. To understand better and help you accordingly can you tell me for how long you have been married and when did the problems start? Can you also write about your problems in details if comfortable? Please message back to continue discussing. I am here to help. Regards

Dear writer, thank you for writing to us. It takes courage to reach out and take this step. I understand you are upset over the state of your marriage. Your husband doesn't understand you and gets angry with you. He also blames you for everything. Your husband doesn't tell you anything and both of you hardly talk to each other. That can be upsetting too. To understand your situation better and help you accordingly could you answer the following How do you feel towards your husband? What kind of things make him angry and what does he blame you for? Can you tell me more about...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. Congratulations on your pregnancy although I understand it has been stressful so far. I understand you are frustrated and upset about the state of your relationship. To help you accordingly can you tell what kind of things set your husband off? Even though you said he pisses you off all the time and it has led you to no longer want to be with him, I am sure it must have brought out some difficult feelings in you... Answering the following questions will give me a better perspective: How long have you been married and when did the problems...

Dear Shelly, We were scheduled for a ten minute chat today. Unfortunately I was a little unwell. Would you like to reschedule for tomorrow at 4.15 pm?

Dear Radhika, thank you for writing to us. I understand you feel very troubled due to the state of your marriage. However to understand better could you please tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals? How would you describe your marriage? Although you said you both fight can you tell me what exactly the fights are about and what is causing them? Please message back to continue our discussion. Regards

Dear Gayatri , thank you for writing to us. I understand you are going through a difficult time. However the information provided by you is very limited. To help you accordingly please answer the following . Was the affair before or after marriage? How long have you been married? What would you like to focus on here? Your husband's feelings or your feelings? Please message back to continue discussing. Regards.

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes courage to have taken this step. I understand you feel very upset and angry when your husband involves your in-laws and your parents during any argument. It seems as though your husband can't handle confrontations. For some people involving others during arguments helps them face the situation and cut down tension. Understandably when your husband does it, this annoys you and makes you angrier than before. Either way the problem is not resolved between the two of you but just suppressed instead. Every married couple is entitled to their...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are feeling very depressed about your marriage ending. However to help you accordingly can you tell me more about your marriage? (Ex: how long have been married and when did the problems start?) I would also like to understand you better so could you please tell me more about yourself and your husband as an individual? Please message back to continue our discussion. We are here to help. Regards

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. You have shown so much courage in reaching out to us. I understand that the state of your marriage has left you feeling upset and depressed. To understand your situation a little better could you tell me if there have been any ongoing problems in your marriage that could have lead to your husband cheating on you? Or Did anything specific happen three years ago that may have triggered your husband to have affairs? Even though these affairs were found out do you think your husband regrets his actions at all? I understand that having your trust...

Dear Writer, thank for writing to us. I understand that this situation has hurt you a lot and you can't tolerate him talking to other women on phone. However the information provided by you is limited. To understand your situation completely could you please tell me about yourself and your husband as individuals. I would also need more information about your marriage (eg. How long have you been married? And since when have there been problems?) What was your husband's​ reaction when you found these messages? Please message back to continue discussing. We are here to help you. Regards

Dear Ravi, thank you for writing to us. It shows courage on your part for having reached out to us. I understand you feel distressed and insecure about your situation. However to understand and help you accordingly could you tell me more about yourself and your wife as individuals and about your relationship as well? How are things between the two of you? Is there a reason for your wife's dislike towards your family? Can you also tell me how they interact with each other? Please do message back to continue our discussion. We can figure it out together. Regards.

Dear Shekhar, thank you for writing in. It took courage on your part to acknowledge that you are in trouble and for having reached out to us. I understand your current situation has left you feeling guilty and confused. It seems as though what you want is at odds with what you feel is right. When you say that you and your ex have been conversing with other frequently and are talking about meeting up, can you be specific with what intent? We know how you feel but does your ex feel the same way? The stress of hiding this interaction from your wife makes you feel guilty and that in turn is...

Dear Sirla, Thank you for writing in. It does take tremendous courage to be open about your crisis. I am a doctor who has been practising therapy for several years. Your sense of "jealousy" is understandable. To establish if it stems from some real facts (which is your view point) or you are making deductions (which is likely your husband's viewpoint), we need to be a bit more objective. To start with, if this was a single, isolated incident, it is best to have an honest conversation, just stating the facts, without making judgments on him (e.g. "I know you did something") or...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. It takes courage and strength on your part to have taken this step. I understand you feel unsupported your husband since you have independently been taking care of your all of your family's​ needs. It can hurt to not receive the kind of help and understanding you hope for from your husband. It is commendable that you are independent financially but yes it perfectly acceptable to want to be treated and respected as an equal in a marriage and want your husband to contribute as much as you. You have mentioned three problems here in your...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing to us. I hope you are comfortable with me responding in English. If not then please let me know. Firstly I understand you in a lot of pain. To have suffered abuse by your husband and fighting over the smallest of reasons can really be depressing. I think you are emotionally drained from what your are dealing with. You are an educated and a well qualified woman and mother to a beautiful daughter but you are not feeling very good about yourself. The state of your relationship has affected you so much that it has changed your outlook towards life. We can work...

Dear writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand that your situation can be very upsetting and painful for you. Firstly​, congratulations on your pregnancy although I understand it has been a stressful time for you. Can you tell me how you feel towards your husband and his family at this point and what your worries are? You said you have suffered a lot of abuse and as much it affected you emotionally was there any physical abuse as well? Even though you said you both are at a divorce stage, is it something you want? Are you afraid of what will happen if you proceed with the divorce?...

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. This is a safe space and you are completely entitled to your privacy and anonymity. I understand you are worried about your husband's reactions to your past. To get a better grip on your situation can you tell me how long have you both been together? These relationships from the past, were they before your marriage and was there a particular reason you wanted to share your past with him? Why do you think this has this upset him so much and lose trust in you? I understand there has been a complete change in his behavior towards you and it hurts you....

Dear writer, thank you for writing to us. I understand you are hurting. To understand your situation better, can you tell me what problems is your mother in law creating? I see these problems are affecting you emotionally. You said in your relationship with your husband there are ego issues. How long have things been this way between the two of you? Perhaps the issues in your relationship are related to your in-laws as well.. When the situation becomes difficult how do you react with your mother in law? I can understand that beyond a point it becomes harder to adjust when there are constant...

Dear User1234, I need to know more about you, your husband and the marriage before I can help you with setting things right. Please write to me about the circumstances of your marriage and your life in detail. Please also tell me about your families. Warm regards. Arunita Biswas

Dear User8895, I would want to know more about your relationship with your brother. Please tell me about your relationship with him when you were growing up? What is the age difference between you both, your family dynamics and whether your family discriminates on the basis on gender. I would want these details in order to help you. Arunita Biswas

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. I understand that you are very upset with your husband because you expect him to stand up for you. It is unfortunate that your in-laws and you don't seem to get along and you feel disrespected and insulted by them. Can you tell me how you react and what exactly you say in such situations to your in-laws? Or do you keep quiet? Considering how upset you are, I understand it makes you question your husband's love for you. Ask yourself this, even though your husband doesn't speak for you, does he tell you that you are wrong? To understand your husband's...

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. Can you tell me more about yourself and your wife so that I can understand your situation better. How long have you been married? Secondly what are your expectations from your marriage and the problems according to you? Also what exactly do you want to focus on in your relationship? Please do message back to continue our discussion.

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I understand you are going through a very difficult time. I was hoping we could discuss this over the phone session you had booked for. However, please feel free to write in here and continue ours discussion till you feel ready for a phone session again. Could you please update me on your current situation and I will be happy to help you accordingly. Regards.

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. I understand you have been married for 3 years and dated your husband for 5 years before that. You feel alone because you can't get attached to him. The difference in your ideologies and lifestyle have contributed to this situation. To get a better grip of your relationship can you tell me more about yourself and your husband as individuals? When you say you were too young, attracted to someone else and couldn't focus on your relationship.. well, It's quite normal to find people outside of your relationship attractive and it's a much needed contributor...

Dear User7935, You have described a very dysfunctional relationship but I would want to know more about you, personally. Tell me more about you and your relationships with others in your life. We will explore your options based on that. Warm regards. Arunita Biswas

Hello, Thank you for sharing your concerns with the askmile team regarding your marriage. It is a hard thing to be in an unhappy marriage. It is harder to find that your husband gone into an extra-marital affair. Your trust in him is totally shaken and now your difficulty in believing him. I understand your struggle in this regard. Now he is reassuring that he would not contact her again. And the reassurance is not impacting you at all. Right? You have enough reasons to NOT to trust him. You said you were a happy and understanding couple. How long did that last? When did the...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I understand you are feeling depressed about your situation. You've been married for 6 years and your husband who loves you abuses you because of what his mother says. I understand that suffering abuse from your husband has lessened your feelings towards your him. To understand better could you tell me what is it that your mother in law says that makes your husband hurt you like this? You don't feel respected in the marriage and are losing patience which is natural to feel after what you have gone through. What do you do when your husband abuses you?...

Dear User0619, I understand that you're in trouble, after reading your mail. However, in order to help you, I need to know more about you as a person. I want you to write to me about yourself, your marriage and your husband, in more detail so that I can get to understand more about you and your situation. Take care. Arunita Biswas

Hello Thank you for contacting the askmile team with your concerns about your marriage. You are bothered by the fact that your wife is unhappy with you. You have two sons studying in the 12th and 7th grades. You know they need a happy home to good with their studies. You feel disturbed at work. You are not able to concentrate. She is unhappy but you do not know why is she unhappy. This is troubling you even more. Certainly I understand your difficulty in this situation. Please write back to us with some more details on your marriage. How long married? Was it an arranged marriage or a...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I can see that you are struggling to trust your husband. Can you tell me how you came across the messages? I understand you find the content of the messages questionable. How has this affected you and your relationship? You say your husband is not friendly by nature but can you tell me more about the nature of your relationship with each other? How long have you both been married? Answering these questions will give me a better picture and help you accordingly. Please do message back to continue our discussion.

Dear Writer, I appreciate your having written in. I understand that your are feeling outnumbered, like nobody is on your side and that it is very painful for you. The fighting between you and your husband has even led to him hiting you and that sounds like you are both losing control of your anger. How long have these fights been happening between the both of you? What is making the two of you fight so much with each other? To understand your situation better can you tell me more about your relationship and about yourself? How are you handling this situation? Please do write back to...

Dear User3585, As I understand, you're a new mother with added responsibility and stress. I would want you to talk at length about your marriage prior to your delivery. It would also seem that the two of you have had problems communicating with each other. In order to help you, I will need to know more about you and your husband, as individuals. Warm regards. Arunita Biswas

Hello, Thank you for sharing concern with the askmile team. I know you feel troubled when you realize that there are fights for major or minor issues. One reason for the fight is your drinking once in a few months. If it is only once in a few moths why she is too much bothered about it? Is there any one in both sides of the families with serious drinking problem? Have you asked her whether she has any other issues with you? Are you both employed? Are you engaged with parenting your daughter? How much help she gets from you on home management? The situation has become like this only last...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I understand that your situation is frustrating and hurtful for you. Love, intimacy, respect and trust are extremely important in a relationship and you are entitled to expect the same from your partner. You are doing everything you can to help your situation and you need your partner to meet you halfway as well. Do you wonder if he had any reservations to this marriage? At this point whatever the reservation, if it doesn't seem to be coming from you then you have to ask yourelf, what is holding your husband back? Ask yourself, does he seem happy to be...

Hello, Thank you for writing to askmile team with your difficulties with your wife. I know it is too much burdensome to live happily when your wife has serious doubts on you. Whenever she is unhappy she talks about the past and your chat history which is troubling you. You tried to explain why the chat in which you said, I love you, and why you purchased the saree for Sunita. Your explanations appear to be not going well with your wife. She has issues with trusting you and believing you. Its quite natural think like this when you have told someone, the day before the marriage, that you...

Dear Writer, thank you for sharing your concern. What I am unclear about is how her conversations came to be recorded and how you managed to hear it as well? When you say objectionable do you mean sexual? The situation seems toxic for your friend regardless of her psychological issues. You might want to find what your friend wants to do? Does she want to work this out somehow with her husband even though he expects an affidavit? Asking for an affidavit clearly shows that he doesn't trust her and trust is the foundation of all relationships. The problems your friend has with her husband,...

Hello, Thank you for writing in to us. Happy to help. After going through what you have shared, I wonder how you are managing your life? I understand you are going through a time where you feel unwanted, and your needs are not satisfied and upon that your husband is a liability that you are managing. I am assuming that you have shared this with your in-laws and you haven't got much help from that side as well. How about taking 2 days off and you going to your parents home and getting time to have a new perspective to your situation? Do you think you can do that? Think about what...

Dear Shweta, thank you for writing in. I understand that your situation can be really frustrating and hurtful for you. It's natural to expect support, respect and validation from your partner. I understand that you don't feel appreciated or valued for what you do and that can hurt. It's​ quite an achievement that you manage your work, home and your family. I understand that letting your husband know about this hasn't yielded the results you hoped for. How do you communicate with him though? Do you wait till the anger builds up and then let it all out or is there a discussion about the...

Dear User8421, Having read your mail, I felt that you are in a lot of trouble and at such a young age. There are a number of issues which have cropped up in your life, at the same time and you seem to be unable to cope with them. As you said, it's quite a long story and I will need to know more about the dynamics of the relationships you have with the different people in your life. I would recommend that you write to me about one relationship at a time and describing them. For instance, your relationship with your parents, in laws, husband, friends, etc. Take care. Arunita Biswas

Dear User6248, Thank you for the mail. I can understand your distress. How long have you been married and how long has your husband been this way? How was your parents relationship with your husband before the marriage and during the wedding. Please tell me more about your relationship with your husband, otherwise? Warm regards..Arunita Biswas

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I understand that not being able to trust your husband can leave you feeling quite unsettled and uneasy. You mention that an incident in the past between your husband and his lady friend led you to distrust him. What about their interaction on chat upset you? How long ago did this happen? Can you elaborate on this incident and how you came to discover it? Either way it must have been very upsetting for you to have found yourself facing something like this. You also mention that he is very close to his friend's family, so does that worry you? To be...

hello, Thanks for contacting the askmile team with your concerns regarding your plans for marriage and the fact about your first marriage. Marriage and divorce registry process is within the Indian legal system and not State specific. I know the tension you go through at this point of time as your marriage is getting fixed. You are very anxious about what to do in this situation. This is more of a legal question and you need to seek professional legal help. My understanding is that in all the government documents you are once married and divorced. Hence, the currnet marriage is your...

Hello, Thank you for writing to askmile with your serious difficulties that you encounter after your marriage. You say you have done enough to make your wife happy but she is not happy. You tried to fulfill her expectations and demands but still not happy. She does not like your family members interacting with you, coming to your house, or taking help. As a farmer your father struggled hard to help you reach where you are today. Also your brother and sister. Now, you want to help your family but she is against helping them, particularly sending money. It appear there is a big gap...

Dear writer, I appreciate your having written to us. I understand that you find yourself in a difficult situation and I imagine it can be emotionally draining as well. So let's try putting it in perspective. You said your husband loves you a lot and is loyal to you, that he is a complex man, yet he questions your character. You said that he is an army man and he goes away on postings, so that means this is a long distance marriage? Do you think this brings out his insecurities about your relationship? I understand that it can hurt to have your character questioned so much, it also means...

Dear User9948, I am very sorry to hear about the tragic turn of events in your life. I can understand that this is not what you were looking forward to in your marriage. I appreciate the fact that you could think of seeking help despite the pain you're in. I want to ask you a few questions in order to understand how things reached here. How long have you been married and how long did you court each other before marriage? Please also tell me a little more about your relationship before and after marriage. We will work this out and restore normalcy in your relationship. I look forward to...

Dear Sriya, I understand that you are very troubled and upset with your current situation. I also understand that life is always more complicated than we can predict. With that said, I'm glad that you have chosen to seek help with this issue rather than let it deteriorate. To better understand the position you're in, I'd want to ask you a few questions and get to know more about your predicament. How did your relationship with your husband start and what made you stay in the relationship for 11 years till you married him? Post marriage, how has the relationship changed or evolved? Can...

Hello, Thank you for writing in to us. Happy to help. I read your query and really appreciate you taking help in difficult times like this. I understand you are going through a troubled time due to your husband. When you say that you want to get back with your husband who is alcoholic and has a relationship with another girl, I wonder what can be the reason you want such a person in your life? Please elaborate on the reasons (pros and cons) of being with your husband. Also, try and think of the impact of divorce on your life (pros and cons). Answering the above questions will...

Dear Writer, thank you for having written to us. I understand that you are feeling hurt and frustrated with your husband. The fact that you want your husband to be more expressive and romantic towards you, talks about your expectation from this marriage. Him not fulfilling this expectation upsets you, makes him seem boring to you and unlike any of the men you have previously been involved with. Now let's look a little deeper into your marriage. What is your day to day interaction like otherwise? What are the things that you do like and love about your husband? Is there anything else...

Dear Writer, thank you for writing in. I understand that you feel ignored and unimportant right now. If you could clarify some of my questions I could get a better grip on your situation. How long have you noticed this habit in your husband? Does it seem to coincide with your pregnancy or delivery? Is there anything else that your husband does that has contributed to your feeling unwanted. You have also mentioned that he sleeps a lot as well. Does he seem to tired to interact because of his work? Have you tried communicating your feelings? Whenever you both interact, what are your...

Hi... I can understand your situation, you must be going through a lot of emotional issues. I appreciate your effort to come forward for support, this shows how much you love your spouse and value your relationship with her. Marriage takes place between two completely different minds and each one would have had some kind of expectation before marriage regarding the kind of partner they want to live with. When these expectations don't match problems arise. You can sit down with your spouse and sort out these things. I also would like to know what are the main things which triggers a fight...

Hello, Thank you for reaching out to the askmile team with your struggles and concerns. I know you are going through a lot of rejection and pain for the last 19 years. When you say, I do not know what is love, I know what you mean. You suffer alone without any help from his family or your family. You might have continued in this troubled marriage because your mother constantly told you to adjust. You say that even your kids are deeply affected by his negative behaivor. At times you thought about separation but did not act on it as you found no support. You need to consult a professional...

Hello, Thank you for reaching out to the Askmile team with your difficult life situation. I understand it is extremely difficult to manage such a situation. You wife wants a divorce but you still wants to work on the marriage. You understand that your short tempered behaivor might have made her react in this mode. Please give me a bit more detail about your situation. Is she still living with you along with your parents? What do you mean by "free life"? Why is she thinking that you have multiple affairs? Any any other important information that you think important for the counsellor...

Hello, Thank you for writing in to us. Happy to help. I have read what you shared and I can understand you are going through a tough time in your life. Most of it results from confusion about your marital relationship. What you have penned down is that your husband moved, he felt aline, he liked being alone, made you sign divorce papers and then is sad about leaving you. It would really help if you cam share what you want? What is it that you are looking for in this relationship or in this divorce? If it's just a concern towards you husband than I understand and the best...

Hi, Thank you for asking this question which is a question in more than half the worlds population. It is good that you decided to find out before making any more further efforts into trying to get rid of the habit called masturbation. Let me bring some joy into your world step by step. First masturbation is the most normal and healthy way of finding a release in the sexual pleasure. Masturbation is the only way many of us experience the joy of sex without a partner or even with a partner. Masturbation saves one from feeling frustrated due to lack of a partner and lack of...

Hi, Firstly, it's really wonderful that you wrote to us and consider us to be a part of your sharing. While I was reading your thoughts I could make out that you indeed are going through a lot and that is kind of suffocating you internally. You mention that you have done your BAMS and you left your practice only because your husband didn't want you to practice as he is not very comfortable with Ayurveda, he being a Doctor himself. It must be really difficult that you had to let go your profession after studying so much and also after taking the initiative. You mention that you don't...

Hello, Woman, Thou r great and mighty. This is what I feel like like telling u after reading your mail. However it has been very good of you to have put your situation in a clear manner. You are very much in touch with the real situation. It is also very obvious that your husband is least affected by your state and is having his social life very much fulfilled. The messaging to other women is also keeping him well fulfilled with his needs. You r going through a tough time and your only solace and Ray of hope is your little son, who makes u smile, laugh and give u a reason for...

Hey. I am sorry to hear all the pain you had to go through but before you make a drastic step of divorcing I feel you should Confront Her. Try to lead the argument toward what makes her do such things. Ask her why she is so reluctant to trust you and feels she has to oversee every aspect of your life. Turn the discussion to her instead of just saying, "NO." which can fail. Help her face her fears to build her trust for you, and weaken her conflicting spirit. While you're confronting it should just be you and her, do not involve a third party or family member. Mention to her, that you...

Hey, Greetings for the day!! I read it and as a guy I would like to say 'SHIT' and before I could say something to this, I would like to ask you something: Is his ego troubling you on the home front or on a professional level? Is there any particular issue on which he gets extremely aggressive and egoistic? Looking forward to hear back from you.

My heart goes out to you. It is tough to be unemployed, but it is equally tough to be the partner watching and supporting the unemployed person. It is a terribly helpless position. Some have become involuntary breadwinners, straining to care for everyone and everything with one lone paycheck. Does your husband need help and encouragement to get a job ? Maybe he feels his resume isnt good enough but he doesnt know where to start. Maybe he doesnt even know what kind of job hes looking for. Break it down into small chunks, and ask yourself: which of these chunks can you do for him? So...

Hello, Thank you for your mail. 16 years is indeed a long time for one to keep trying to make things better in a relationship. You deserve some tender love and care for sure. I can understand that you are hurting and hurting deep. Also it is great that you decided to do something about it by asking the question on this site. Many individuals go through the same without making an effort to do something about it. During my three decades of counselling I have experienced that results come when we stop trying to look for change in others and start working towards self. We all seek...

Hi, Let me first congratulate you as you are getting into a new phase of you life. Something that is really nice to know about you is you are very jovial, talkative, and lively. It feels really wonderful to stay around someone like this. Makes every moment easier and worthwhile as you would have a lot of stuff to share and every moment would fun for you and your partner. These days it is actually very difficult to find people who are so interactive. You did mention that you are scared that people would talk ill about you as they take your behavior in a very wrong manner, they have...

Hi Rupa, first of all i would like to appreciate you for taking decision for yourself and listening to your inner feelings and something more to appreciate you is that, you've come forward to seek help, I can feel that you wanted to be empowered and fulfill your desires. Thank you for posting me a good and valuable question. It's my pleasure to help you. Yes i understand your feelings and what your going through. It is seen that it's bothering you very much you dont have to be scared by assuming things and worst situations what might happen? assuming things may add on more stress to your...

Hi, I have gone through your query and I understand that you are having trouble in sexual relations with your husband. You did sought professional help but it didn't help much. Trust me, it is not a rare issue. Many couples face this but very few seek help. I really appreciate you seeking help. You will have to be very patient, I know and understand that it is difficult but hasting the process won't do any good. So why not try to be patient, as you are doing and find out the solution. A detailed history to understand your life can help in understanding what is happening, which a...

Hi, i can understand that it must be really difficult for you to go through this phase of your life, where in you need your life partner to be there mentally and support you with all aspects of your and your sons life and his absence making you feel angry, frustrated and lonely and another he is refusing to do so again and again. key here would be to understand why he is doing what he is? i know it sounds difficult for you to keep all your emotions and issuse's with him aside and with neutral mind just attempt to understand him and his reasons for doing so. But if you can make him feel...

Hi, I understand you are in dilemma these days, where one side you have your family which you love and the other side you are getting attracted to the attention you are getting from a friend which these days is missing from your husband. There are different ways to look at this situation which will help you get perspective into your situation. For example, is it the adventure that you are liking after a monotonous life that you have been living? (you can explore adventure with your husband too) OR is it the infatuation which is making you think of doing things that you would not do...

Hi, Thank you for seeking help to resolve your issues. And I am saying thank you as you have not waited till things get totally out of control and situations become very messy. It must be difficult to see that your husbands elder Bhabhi who is also your elder sister in law seems to be a problem for you. You must be newly married and wanting to shower all the love and attention to your husband. It is quite normal to feel why the Bhabhi is taking clothes and why her children are coming in your house. However please relax sit back and give this a thought that you are married into a...

Hi,As I understand, you are in a relationship with a relative of yours who is elder to you and your family knows about it. And you have tried to convince them but have not succeeded yet.I assure you you are not the first one going through such a situation. There are many who go through such phase. Is age the only concern of your parents? If yes, give them time to get adjusted to this fact. If you and your boyfriend are serious about it and tell them that you are not going to marry anyone else, then eventually they will come around. But in case that is not the only reason, you need to give...

Hi, I understand it is difficult and you are going through phase where you feel lost, but good part is you have taken first step towards it, sometimes you can find yourself only once you loose yourself, please help us understand you better by describing it in detail, you can choose to express it by giving examples or just letting know your feelings so we can help you better Hope this helps Do write back to us

Dear friend, I'd like to appreciate you for trying to face your problem and trying to help yourself. It takes a lot of courage to do that. I know you're going through a difficult time right now. You're torn apart what what you want and what you feel is right. From what you've told me, I understand that you know what it feels like to be cheated on and the emotional damage it can cause to the other person. So you know to some extent that even harmless texting can hurt the other person involved. Although it may not be completely wrong to text someone, it's more about how you feel about the...

Hi, First of all, I'd like to appreciate you for addressing that you have an issue. Its not easy to admit that and by doing so you have already moved one step towards your happiness. From what you've said, it seems like you haven't completely dealt with the feelings of your breakup with your ex. You mentioned you were happy with him and that you're attracted to this man who reminds you of him. The first thing to do is to remind yourself of the reason why you broke up. Your ex cheated on you. That's not something that you can get over easily. It would take a lot of time and venting out...

Hi, if you could describe in detail of what makes you feel that your husband wants you and your son to go away for a while? and what does your son think and feel about all these? i will be better able to help you with it For now communicating and understanding in depth of what bothers him should help write back to us so we can help you better

Hi, Thank you for having faith in us to relieve you of your worries. It must be very difficult to experience a relationship based on monetary conditions. You must be feeling so let down that there was so much love and now it is love only if money is there. And yes of course you have a baby, you are a mother so your life is very valuable and important for your baby and the baby's future. It is very nice that you are independent and you earn well from your tution work. Tution means you are also helping other children learn better and gain confidence in their studies. You are not on this...

Greetings, It is clearly seen by the way that you have mentioned that you clearly value this woman a lot and are also focussing your lot of time in your relationship which is nice as well, but as long as she is mentioning it clearly to you that, it is just you and that she is casually having the talk with others as well. I think what needs more work on is you, you need to work on yourself in a way that you should not be hurt, wherein you are more vocal about what you feel, I know that you have spoken with her about how it feels, but what I am trying to see being more vocal and firm about...

Hey, I read, re-read and then again read to understand the intricacy of this situation. Since you have kind of decided what to do already in your mind and wrote this problem. I think the first thing you should be doing is talking to your partner with whom you are willing to relocate with. Initiate the conversation with your current partner ask about the concerns that are going in your head. Firstly talk about how your parents are taking care of your children and how you want to settle down where you will be doing your part, and also expect support from your partner, in that way there is...

Hey .... I understand you have a lot of frustration and pent up anger . When you marry , not only does your relationship with your mate change,but so does your relationship with his family . When you were in love it would have been totally different from marriage . couples are often surprised and confused by the challenges faced in marriage and without previous preparation for the bumps along the way , couples often conclude that their relationship isn't working . One of the biggest challenges of married life is to get along well with in laws. Though this goes for both partners in a...

Hi there, I appreciate the courage and the motivation You have to take the first step to help your marriage. It shows that you're willing to try your best to help your relationship, which is in itself admirable. You seem like someone who knows exactly what's happening in your relationship and the role you play in it. You mentioned that you lose your temper with your husband often. Probably we could look more into the triggers of your anger. Why and when do you get angry with him. You also said that he doesn't pay any attention to you when you do get angry. Its possible that this could...

Greetings, It is totally normal to have feelings for a person, as long as the person knows that you are interested and also my strong suggestion to you is that do not follow the so called "+ve signals", and ask her verbally and get her opinion on you. After that you can escalate the topic and you can take the families for a lunch or something and ask them openly. There is saying, if you want something you got to ask for it, or else you won't get it. Thank you.

hi, From what i understand you expect him to support you in certain way in which he is not responding. Usually our expectations of expression of affection , support and love arise from the way we give, however when partner expresses in different ways, we are unable to recognise that and keep feeling ignored, so learn the ways in which he expresses support. if you could also tell me more about the same with examples of times when he chooses to stay away from you either asking on personal message or question back, we can work on it in depth Hope this helps :)

Greetings, I read and read about what you wrote and can tell you that what problems that you are facing and extremely engraving for your kids, if it is happening in their presence. Firstly I ask you to sit and talk with Mother-In-Law and make her understand and increase the bonding with her, because clearly she is the one according to you is poisoning him against you; so I suggest you strengthen that bond that you have with her, initially she might think that this is a part of some big plan that you are executing against her, but this is in reality to work for a better future for you and...

Hi, At the start of the marriage, it may take time for partners to understand each other and become intimate. From what you have said about your relationship, you both seem to like and understand each other. Communication is key. Talk to each other about the issue, and if it still seems like you both have a problem, it would be best to consult a sexologist or have a proper thorough checkup with a psychologist as well to see where the issue lies. Wishing you both all the best.

Hi, I understand it must be frustrating for you to go from being an independent working woman to a stay at home mom. The great thing is you want to become independent again! Yes, I agree with you that there are a lot of fake work from home sites these days, but that does not need to be the only option for you. There are ways you can keep yourself occupied and pursue a career from home. First, you would need to understand what you are interested in. It could be a hobby or even something that you have always wanted to do. While thinking about what you want to do, keep in mind the time you...

Hi, It seems to me that you are extremely self aware of your feelings and the role you play in this situation. You know the exact consequence of each of your actions and how it will affect others. You seem like a person who really cares a lot for your girlfriend and the others around you. However marriage is a decision that needs to be taken after thinking about it carefully. It's a decision that is taken by two people who are consenting to it. If one partner does not want it and is unhappy about it, it directly affects the happiness of the other partner. You and your family are scared of...

Hi, I can understand what you are feeling. Being treated differently by your inlaws can be frustrating and makes you feel like an outsider. Adjustment with the in-laws can be stressful and takes time, there are a few things you can do to cope with the situation, however, I would need you to share in little more detail what are the issues that are bothering you and why you are feeling sad. SO please send me a private message by clicking on my profile and we can discuss how to help you in more detail. Thanks. Look forward to hearing from you. :) 

Hi, i can feel all the pain that you have gone through over period of 6 years, specially looking at your son being beaten as well, its brave of you to have moved out of the abusive relationship, now at a point where you are considering moving back with him or divorce, it would be wise to move back if you are completely healed of trauma, fear, pain that came along as part of being with him and also if you trust him again for change he is showing you ,not because your son misses him. chances are that he has changed for good, but un-till you feel safe around him, think of how your...

Hi, The fact that you are asking this question means you are contemplating over two options of either being with your husband or choosing your friend, Reflect upon what makes you consider these things? talk to your husband and discuss about the same with him before deciding on anything. for further help please describe your reflections and reasons of thinking about these two options hope this helps,

Dear, Loosing anyone and specially in your case loss of parent can be very difficult, it is bound to leave you with feelings of sadness, guilt, anger and bereavement, which takes lot of time to heal. From what you have described you seem to be dealing with two things, one your mothers death and second expectations from your husband to support you in certain way during this. Like you pointed out he seems to have done everything when you lost your mother, its only now that you feel that missing support, to me he looks like someone who does things when they are verbally and clearly...

Hi, This has been quiet common, many married women says , " my husband has changed after wedding" or " he does not respect me" etc, many ladies are facing the same thing like you, i can understand that you might be feeling disappointed, hopeless and frustrated by this, but good thing is it can be worked upon with little efforts. First thing i would want you to reflect upon is if you understand his ways of expressing love and respect? often it happens that we have style of expressing love and respect and we expect our partners to express in the same way, For example some people enjoy...

Hi, i understand that you are going through tough time, Marriage is huge event in anyones life and brings lot of change, and its often not easy to adjust to it, and i would highly encourage you to see a counsellor, who can help you process these emotions and then you can think clearly. if you want to opt for online, telephonic or chat mode, you can ask for it here or leave your location in personal mail so we can help you find psychologist in the area. Hope this helps, write back to us for any further queries.

Hi, I can imagine the amount of pain and anger you are feeling post action of your husband i can also understand confusion you are going through, where in on one hand you are angry and are contemplating on leaving him and on another its not easy to end relationship of 8 years, it is normal to experience shock and significant emotional trauma as a result of finding out about the affair. you she may feel anger and hopeless. This phase in relationship is often a roller coaster of emotions which may come with tears and conflict but you can not think clearly with so much going on SO it is...

Hi, what makes you feel fear of losing job? if you could describe it in little more detail we can help you better please feel free to write back to us

Hi, Its great to notice that you are already aware of different personalities both of you have and are looking for solution, where as there is nothing wrong in having upfront nature or being sensitive to words and tone, solution would be found in learning new communication skills and practicing those from both ends , where you can learn to express your strong views in assertive ways then that from making him feel that you are aggressive, that will help him feel safe and lower down his irritation and anger outbursts as well. Once he feels safe you can always talk to him about how both of...

Hi, I cannot imagine the trauma that you have been suffering for all these years. You must be a really brave lady to have endured this pain for the past 10 years and coming out now and sharing this, could not have been easy. being in an abusive relationship is not healthy and I am sure you must have seen it take a toll on your health. However, I understand that your son is the main concern here. While a divorce may impact your child and your concerns are valid, it may not be healthy for your son to grow up in a toxic environment where he sees your husband abusing you all the time. My...

Dear, Friend While I read your Passage, i can only imagine the amount of pain and loss you are going through right now, i am sure you already know that its important for you to rest and eat healthy at this point of time and you must be doing that to physically heal yourself, i also understand your need to vent and talk it out to someone, it definitely is first step to take care of your mind as well, with the anger you might have right now towards your husband, it is amazing to read that you did not hesitate to point of good things that he does for you and you are not only making fair...

Dear lady, i am glad to know that financial dependence is not the reason for you to hold onto your relationship, however there is something because of which you still holding to it after him cheating you sexually with another women, please write down what makes you hold on to it? it may be difficult to write this down in midst of all that you are going through however it will give you clarity on what makes you stay your description also mentions how you forgave him about him cheating on you, so if you forgave how does that incident resurfaces after so long when others things are...

Hi there, I am sorry to hear that you are currently unhappy and feeling depressed. I can imagine the kind of pain you are in and it may not have been easy to come out and share this. However, by doing so, you have shown great courage. If you are unhappy in your current marriage, it would be advisable to seek professional help. Possibly see a marriage counselor or any other professional to discuss this matter in more depth. You may even need to bring your husband in and attend a few sessions together as you alone cannot fix this situation. In a marriage, there are always two people involved...

Hi, I understand your concerns, you are feeling neglected and unheard in the relationship. You feel that he is favouring his family over yours and forcing you to do the same. While there is a need for professional help in order to solve this matter, there are a few things you can do to help smoothen things temporarily. First, listening to his perspective and why he is adamant about not maintaining communication with your family. It is understandable that you may not like what he has to say about your family, but listening with an open mind is important even if you do not agree with his...

What you and your wife are experiencing is often referred to by professionals as the 'travelling spouse syndrome' and this has taken a toll on a lot of couples recently, causing stress and strain on marriages. fortunately, there are simple solutions to fix this. First, It is important that when you travel that you make your wife feel more connected. Today, with modern technology, there are several ways that you can achieve this. a quick message during the day, a skype call whenever you both are free can go a long way. The reasons why spouses tend to get upset or frustrated when their...

Your Frustration is understandable. Irrespective of the love & caring your husband shows towards you, not having a voice or a say in things can get you to a restricted or cornered position hence frustrated. Now the primary question is to what extent is your husband aware of his behaviour and the way it has been affecting you. He sounds like a terrific person to begin with. He might be habituated to having an upper hand/controlling/dominant position with an ongoing assumption that he has been doing what is best for the family. As his intentions are good, he need not be aware of the...